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them crime

Twitter win! Hit-and-run witness takes number plate and tweets victim

A cyclist was targeted in a hit-and-run on the Old Kent Road in South London last night

Image credit Evening Standard

Thankfully, the cyclist wasn’t seriously injured. But the event showed how useful Twitter can be for spreading the word about crimes and where to report them.

Twitter user Richard Amos tweeted to say he’d witnessed the crime:

And while some replies were stupid, others helpfully shared resources for traffic crime reporting, like the London fixed-gear and single-speed forum.

Yay Twitter!

cory doctorow them schools fight the power

School authority pulls Cory Doctorow novel for questioning school authority

A high school in Pensacola, Florida, has pulled Cory Doctorow’s young adult novel, Little Brother, from a reading programme

The cyber-fiction story was on Booker T Washington High School’s summer reading programme, but was pulled because of:

concerns that some parents might object to scenes involving sex and violence and the idea of questioning authority

Responding in a blog post, Doctorow talked about discussions he had with the school’s principal:

In short, he made it clear that the book was being challenged because of its politics and its content.

How bad at maintaining authority does a teacher have to be for a flipping sci-fi novel to seem like a threat?

Students are allowed to read the book as an “optional title”, and Doctorow’s publisher have ‘helpfully’ sent 200 free copies to the school.

Little Brother is about a teenage steampunk/hacker called W1nst0n who has to stop robot principal Zero Bri3n from erasing the cyberspace prom. We expect.

If it’s been banned by YOUR head teacher,you can read it (and other Doctorow novels) for free on his website.

them David Cameron Turing Test Artificial Intelligence

Revolutionary “David Cameron A.I.” Javascript has passed the Turing Test!

This is definitive proof that our Prime Minster could be/may have already been replaced by a computer

Here’s a transcription of the groundbreaking code:

switch (Math.floor(Math.random()”10001)) (
case 0:
    camaswer: ” “Look… we can talk about that, or we can address the real problems of hard working families.” ;
break
case 1:
     camanswer: ” “That’s not the question. The question is ‘Are we doing enough to help hard working families?’” ;
break
case 2:
    camanswer: ” “Listen to my list of three points while I wave my hands about.” ;
break
case 3:
    camanswer: ” “Look… we live in a democracy and I totally support your right to ask that.” ;
break
case 4:
    camanswer: ” “When we first came into power… we said things… and that’s something we should be proud of.” ;
break
case 5 
    camanswer: ” “I was in some town last week. I met a man/woman just like you. He/she agreed with me.” ;
break
case 6 
    camanswer: ” “I’m sorry — I can’t discuss my friends as it might affect all their court cases.” ;
break
case 7 
    camanswer: ” “You have to wonder what’s wrong with Alex James, really.” ;
break
case 8 
    camanswer: ” “My advisors wrote out a hashtag for me. What’s a hashtag? Also, what’s an internet?” ;
break
case 9 
    camanswer: ” “Grrr Terrorists! Paedophiles!” ;
break
case 10 
    camanswer: I once called Barack Obama ‘Daddy’, and Vladamir made fun of me.” ;
break
default
    camanswer: ” “Look… but what I will say is hard working families.” ;

Via @uidtim

them hampstead heath alien mushrooms

Going to Hampstead Heath this weekend? Watch out for ALIEN MUSHROOMS!

Some “alien mushrooms” have been found on Hampstead Heath (i.e. mushrooms never-before-seen in the British Isles)

The toxic, chestnut brown funghi was spotted by mushroom expert Andy Overall, who says they are usually found in Europe and that how they got here is a “mystery”.

We won’t be surprised if, this weekend, the Heath’s usual dog walkers and al fresco picnickers are joined by bearded men in tie-dye fumbling around in the foliage…

Via Camden New Journal

them swearing royal mail

Royal Mail refuses to deliver sweary magazine, needs to grow the fuck up

Marketing magazine The Drum aren’t interested in football, as their latest cover loudly proclaims

How daringly controversial!

Too daringly controversial for the private postal service Royal Mail, which is refusing to deliver the issue to The Drum’s subscribers

They’re concerned that seeing THE SECOND WORST WORD could warp the fragile minds of children or postmen.

A Royal Mail staff member told The Drum that it would be unable to distribute the magazine due to the “offensive word on the front cover”.

He explained: “There is potential that a child could pick up mail meant for their parents,” adding that “the company has previously stated that such words are not permitted on mail”.

He added that Royal Mail staff could “see it and take offence”.

Source: The Drum

We’re a bit worried that retired Brazilian footballer Argelico Fucks won’t get the birthday card we were going to send him :(

them rik mayall Daily Mail

Daily Mail commenter pays respects to Rik Mayall in unique ‘Daily Mail commenter’ style

We reckon these comments are probably actually the work of a TROLL INFILTRATOR on the Daily Mail website:

They’re so over the top in their box-ticking indignation about the “hard left BBC” and “socialist characters” poisoning impressionable minds, they have to be a parody.

If the comments really are a heartfelt expression of genuine feelings, and not an attempt to stir up the hornets nest of online comment, we’re seriously concerned about the blood pressure levels of “R. J. Hey, Chester”.

(And anyway, The New Statesman was on ITV not the BBC.)

Via @DMReporter